What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Should you have a threesome with your best friend and your significant other if the significant other requests it?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why do Darwin atheists not like facts of Genesis? I’ve noticed they block and dismiss everything a person states. Is that how science works to hide when a truth comes at them?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Make Nazis afraid again!

TEXT:

Were any US Generals hurt or killed yesterday in Damascus, Syria, yesterday 5/9/24?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

What are tips for weight loss?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Hi, I’m Jo. My best friend died 2 years ago today. My husband died 6 months later. So, I’m a depressed mess (we were married 28 years) and can’t shake it. Even my Brother is worried. Some days I don’t do anything, and avoid men cause I don’t want to date. Any suggestions? Thanks for reading.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Why do I sweat between my legs all the time, top off my legs, all way down?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Healthy aging: Eating more berries, flavanoids may be key - Medical News Today

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

A protestant (one that adheres to sola scriptura) disagrees with a catholic. How do they propose resolving the dispute?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What would happen if Kakashi and Naruto switched places?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Did Leonardo da Vinci paint two Mona Lisas? Where are they?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

I'm a 28-year-old guy who has never been in a relationship, nor can I seem to find someone who wants to be in one with me. Why do I feel like a freak?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority